It really does feel like everyone has a drug problem these days, Schneeweis.

[REDACTED] is a ket addict, smoking weed every week and still buying packs of Newports and throwing them out after taking a couple. Money is tight, but that doesn't matter! Damaged goods!

[REDACTED] is doing coke, ket, and weed. Pretty depressed, pretty empty. That feeling of the lack of control of the body is apparent.

[REDACTED] is a lifelong opioid addict. Phenibut, Gabapentin, the works.

[REDACTED] was overdosing outside the apartment off heroin or worse. Thank god for Narcan. Hell to Nitazines.

[REDACTED] really likes speed, has an ADHD prescription coincidentally. Wants meth, takes drugs for the fun of it.

[REDACTED] takes ket to forget about the gnawing disconnection with anyone around.

[REDACTED] has an apartment littered with whippits. Weed is everyday, every time.

[REDACTED] smokes Marlboro reds (gross), sniffs poppers, and hopes to drug themselves to the point of vegetation.

[REDACTED] used to do so much DXM, and now focuses on ket. Brain fried. DXM is the devil.

[REDACTED]'s brain broke after enough DXM. Hatred of those once close, paranoia. DXM is the devil.

[REDACTED] likes speed. Smokes too.

[REDACTED] can't do molly or acid anymore. The presence of Xanax causes anxiety, Ketamine causes want. Former smoker.

[REDACTED] is never not on acid. Raves for molly and ket.

[REDACTED] feels safe when on ket.

To call this a problem is incorrect - but it's floating around correctness. I never really understood what an addiction was before actually getting a drug addiction that's marked societally as one. It's hard to describe, but the one thought that permeates my mind most about them is the subversiveness. You never know you're addicted until you step back and see things at a distance. It's similar to finding out whether partners are manipulative - individual actions will never really show you much. Even then, its still difficult.

Reality gives the impression that addictions are very discrete entities. You play Fallout, you do the drug-sounding drug, and after you take a specific amount you'll be notified that you're addicted to XYZ. After exactly VVV days, -5% Max health, -3% Movement speed, 5% less damage dealt. You know exactly what's going on, you get direct feedback on how you're "suffering", and there is no psychological desire present. In reality, you never see your life fall apart when you do drugs. Sometimes it doesn't even fall apart at all. But other times, you miss an assignment. You didn't maximize job finding because you spent 20 hours a week high and now money is getting tight. You just really need a cigarette. You're hanging out with folx who get you to try DXM, and now you just have another tool for fun to do at home, to relieve that stress, to feel nice.

I don't want to demonize drugs, or even imply them as solely harmful. Ultimately, folx do what they want with the reality given, and given an incessant capital machine and little outs for enjoyment, it's pretty optimal to go to raves and bump ket. It's rough though, it's really rough.

Drugs make me sad. They make me think of the community of people that I relate to at the root, the people I'll try to protect to my last breath, and I get sad. I get really sad.